This month, our focus cornerstone is positivity.
A video from Duke women’s basketball coach Kara Lawson has really stuck with me. Her message to her players was simple: don’t wait for life to get easier. Learn to handle hard better.
That feels especially important for our kids.
As parents, we naturally want to make life easier for our children. We want to fix the problem, remove the obstacle, or protect them from disappointment. But some of the most important growth in their lives will come from learning how to deal with things that are hard.
A tough class. A friendship problem. Not making the team. Getting a grade they don’t like. Being held accountable for a mistake. Having to keep working at something that doesn’t come easily. These are all tough things I dealt with as a kid. And they are also tough things I’ve seen my own kids struggle through.
Positivity doesn’t mean telling our kids those things aren’t hard. It means helping them believe, “I can do hard things. I can learn from this. I can figure out what to do next.”
Research on resilience tells us much the same thing. Resilient people still experience frustration, disappointment, and stress. What helps them bounce back is their ability to find something positive to hold onto and a constructive way forward.
That’s where positivity really matters. It isn’t helping our kids avoid every hard thing. It’s helping them believe they can get through hard things. When we support them, encourage them, and stay beside them while they work through challenges, they build confidence and resilience. If we remove every obstacle, they miss the chance to learn that they can handle it.
One of the best things we can give our kids is not an easier path, but the encouragement and support they need to keep going when the path is hard. That’s the kind of positivity that helps them handle harder things better.
